"Close your eyes and let your spirit start to soar, and you`ll live as you`ve never lived before." Erich Fromm .
RSS

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

cold feet?

"If you will call your troubles experiences, and remember that every experience develops some latent force within you, you will grow vigorous and happy, however adverse your circumstances may seem to be." --James Russell Miller

Last trimester was a kinda traumatic experience for me. Looking back at it, I still couldn't fathom how I did all the requirements my prof gave me. I could say that it made me feel like a real and true student. Well, I was a slacker back then but due to maturity I'm now more responsible when it comes to studying( I think so...). That time of my life is over and I'm glad that I am able to survive that appaling trimester. I don't have to see my prof who gave me a hard time. Thank god for that. It was a challenge and part of me is glad that I took the challenge but then I don't ever wish to do it again. I think I might not survive...traumatized..hahaha! Well, that's what I thought...I thought I will not encounter my scary prof again but then there's a possibility that things might not go well next trimester since there's a big chance that I really have to get the course that my scary prof is going to handle next term. I still have time to change my fate though. I just have to make my convincing power and charm work and hope my temper will not ruin my plans.

Months from now will be the start of my first term and if my plan fails, I can say that I am doom. Gosh! I'm sure I will have endless sleepless nights and worries. I can imagine the awful things that might happen to me and to my classmates. It's kinda funny if I'm going to think about it. Funny to think that everybody will be nervous and everybody will be dreading their class. Funny to think that all will look terrible.

Am I up to the challenge? I'm not sure. Maybe not. It scares the hell out of me but then thinking about it all over again and again makes me realize that maybe I should take the challenge. Enroll in the course that my scary prof will handle. Part of me thinks that I will learn a lot from her. Sometimes my classmates joke around and tell me that I'm one of the unluckiest person in our class. In a way, yes..I'm unlucky but I did learn something...just in a hard way.

I'm crossing my fingers that something good will happen. If not, then I will just cross the bridge when I get there. Maybe it will be a good experience for me and maybe it will make me a better person than I am now.

No comments: